In those times you felt so empty inside...
In those times you got no direction...
Where you want to be? Where you want to go? What do you want to do?
You cannot answer those simple questions. And you do not know why.
Maybe you want to try everything to know what really can make you happy.
But you are not selfish. You cannot just do what you want to do.
You need to consider a lot of things.
Your family. They are depending on you. In everything they need for a living.
Without you, they won't have any more resources. It's just you.
That's maybe the life to bear of the poor.
So what you gonna do now? You love them. That's 100% sure.
You cannot gamble their future. You cannot take risk for your own self fulfillment.
But you want to do something for yourself.
You want to see the world. You want to travel. To explore.
And maybe to find love. Nope, not that, you still believe it will come to you in the right time.
You simply want to fulfill what your heart's desire.
The desire that until now you do not know.
How would you know? You never try any other things aside from the things you usually do.
How would you know if you are better in other things than to what you are doing right now?
Is there still a chance for you to get to know more of yourself?
In those times you just want nothing but to feak out.
To shout to the whole world that you want to do something else.
That you are not happy in where you are right now.
That you want something more.
More fulfilling. More productive. Livelier. Happier.
In those times you believe you can do better. Perform a certain task better.
That you are the best in that thing once.
You did it well before, why not now?
What happened to you? You do not know.
Your performance is degrading. Your habit is coming to its worst.
You cannot find any more determination.
You just let yourself go down. You never know now your way up.
In those times you know well your way up.
In those times that you are determined to achieve something.
In those times that you want to succeed so that your life can change.
But those times belief are happening now.
Many think you are successful.
Indeed you are.
But deep inside, you don't feel it.
You are still in the life you once had.
You don't want it anymore. You want a change.
You want to give something better to your family.
You end up not giving yourself just to give them everything.
But it's not enough. No one is happy.
I don't know. You don't know.
In those times when you thought that everything will be easy
when you study well and a have a diploma.
But life is getting harder and harder each day.
Nothing's getting better, just getting worse.
To those who may read will think that you don't have contentment.
You do. They just don't know how sad your life is.
You cannot even buy yourself the simplest things you want.
All your salaries will go for the family that is waiting for you.
You even run out of your allowance for work.
To think you are single? But that's maybe the cross that an eldest child of a poor family must carry.
You want to save so that someday you can travel.
But what you have now is not even enough for the basic need of your family.
You maybe earning more than what majority of your batch mates do.
But they can spend lavishly and not you.
Well, you are not giving up.
You don't have any right to.
But happiness, I wish will find you.
Oh.. I know your happy even you're sad.
That is how optimistic you are.
So maybe you will find completeness someday.
You may find what you really want to do.
You may finally say that you are contented of your life.
And that you may look back to those times that you are ranting like this about life.
Do not worry, I understand you.
The world understands you.
You are not alone. Others have more troubles than you.
You are strong. I believe you are.
Maybe you just need more focus of what you have today and let tomorrow worry for itself.
Just live for now. Stop searching for a while and just focus.
And all that makes your heart heavy, let it go.
Those times will be happier to remember when you finally surpass these all.
After all, this is not even the end.
Your story still continues.
Just go on.
Blogger's note:
This was made through reflections of what MAYBE other people are going through. Day to day, we saw different people we never knew. We look at them, and we sometimes wonder, "What's going through with them..." This is a reminder too, for me, to keep grounded and to do not judge other's capabilities on their situations. We do not know, what they are really going through. If you can help them, just do, If you cannot, please, just let them.
In those times you got no direction...
Where you want to be? Where you want to go? What do you want to do?
You cannot answer those simple questions. And you do not know why.
Maybe you want to try everything to know what really can make you happy.
But you are not selfish. You cannot just do what you want to do.
You need to consider a lot of things.
Your family. They are depending on you. In everything they need for a living.
Without you, they won't have any more resources. It's just you.
That's maybe the life to bear of the poor.
So what you gonna do now? You love them. That's 100% sure.
You cannot gamble their future. You cannot take risk for your own self fulfillment.
But you want to do something for yourself.
You want to see the world. You want to travel. To explore.
You simply want to fulfill what your heart's desire.
The desire that until now you do not know.
How would you know? You never try any other things aside from the things you usually do.
How would you know if you are better in other things than to what you are doing right now?
Is there still a chance for you to get to know more of yourself?
In those times you just want nothing but to feak out.
To shout to the whole world that you want to do something else.
That you are not happy in where you are right now.
That you want something more.
More fulfilling. More productive. Livelier. Happier.
In those times you believe you can do better. Perform a certain task better.
That you are the best in that thing once.
You did it well before, why not now?
What happened to you? You do not know.
Your performance is degrading. Your habit is coming to its worst.
You cannot find any more determination.
You just let yourself go down. You never know now your way up.
In those times you know well your way up.
In those times that you are determined to achieve something.
In those times that you want to succeed so that your life can change.
But those times belief are happening now.
Many think you are successful.
Indeed you are.
But deep inside, you don't feel it.
You are still in the life you once had.
You don't want it anymore. You want a change.
You want to give something better to your family.
You end up not giving yourself just to give them everything.
But it's not enough. No one is happy.
I don't know. You don't know.
In those times when you thought that everything will be easy
when you study well and a have a diploma.
But life is getting harder and harder each day.
Nothing's getting better, just getting worse.
To those who may read will think that you don't have contentment.
You do. They just don't know how sad your life is.
You cannot even buy yourself the simplest things you want.
All your salaries will go for the family that is waiting for you.
You even run out of your allowance for work.
To think you are single? But that's maybe the cross that an eldest child of a poor family must carry.
You want to save so that someday you can travel.
But what you have now is not even enough for the basic need of your family.
You maybe earning more than what majority of your batch mates do.
But they can spend lavishly and not you.
Well, you are not giving up.
You don't have any right to.
But happiness, I wish will find you.
Oh.. I know your happy even you're sad.
That is how optimistic you are.
So maybe you will find completeness someday.
You may find what you really want to do.
You may finally say that you are contented of your life.
And that you may look back to those times that you are ranting like this about life.
Do not worry, I understand you.
The world understands you.
You are not alone. Others have more troubles than you.
You are strong. I believe you are.
Maybe you just need more focus of what you have today and let tomorrow worry for itself.
Just live for now. Stop searching for a while and just focus.
And all that makes your heart heavy, let it go.
Those times will be happier to remember when you finally surpass these all.
After all, this is not even the end.
Your story still continues.
Just go on.
This was made through reflections of what MAYBE other people are going through. Day to day, we saw different people we never knew. We look at them, and we sometimes wonder, "What's going through with them..." This is a reminder too, for me, to keep grounded and to do not judge other's capabilities on their situations. We do not know, what they are really going through. If you can help them, just do, If you cannot, please, just let them.
4 comments:
hi shane!! it's been a while xx hope you're doing better than the vibe I get off this post haha. Do smile and keep your chin up! x
Thank you for this post. I am struggling surpassing college and this made me feel alot better. I know, it's maybe unrelated since I don't feed my family yet but you know, those times you just sit in your bed thinking how sad life is? Making want to stop because everything isn't working out the way you want it to be. But I think sometimes, I overlook things and I don't realize that I have come this far. Well, thank you for reminding me that life isn't stopping here.
You are welcome 😊
You are welcome 😊
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